Hello lovely friends...
I have to say a huge Thank You to those of you that sent me messages of kindness and emails too.
Its situations like this I have real trouble with... I dont know what to say without I guess saying the wrong thing. And expressing what I really want to say is really hard...
I have been having a real tough time lately what with all my own problems (Spld's and anemia). I am trying to act as 'normal' as possible ... what ever that is!
Yes my dad is still in hospital, and by the looks of it has something wrong with him that does need urgently sorting. Monday the cardiac team will be discussing things with him, so I should now more. I am just trying to carry on, you know doing the things I have to, to stay busy.
I wanted to share something with you all... its a very interesting site I found all about dyspraxia. Yes this is one of the things I have.. and well it explains things really good and I thought as its Dyspraxia Awareness week 12 th October until 18 th October I would share it with you all. I sont have everything that is listed in the information... but I have a lot of them!
HERE is the link to read all about it.
Having SpLd's for me sometimes is very frustrating as people cannot 'see' anything wrong with me. Lately I have been explaining myself more and more... as I just dont want people to take me the wrong way. I am not a shouty angry person.. I am nice and dont want people to get the wrong idea of me. On the internet I write, people read... sometimes I may say or comment with the wrong thing (according to people reading my comment). I try so hard to check I think its ok to leave the message I have.. I sometimes dont actually know if I may of wrote the wrong thing.
I find deaths and illness the hardest thing.... I usually just follow what everyone else has put. I never know how to react with these things. I am sorry to say but my 'feelings' dont recognise things like this...unless pointed out. So yes now my dad is ill, and my mum... I dont 'feel' anything... not really... I just know they are ill and not at home and I want my dad to get better. I am not a hugging loving person, I dont really like to be touched. But I am emotional... I cry... I get frustrated a lot and usually end up crying. I dont really cope to well with 'out of the norm' things.
I tend to take things literally and as they are asked.... I have been told I dont get or understand sarcasm or humor. I do have a sense of humor but Han and Jon say its basic and my own style! ha ha In a whole world of my own! I find to not appear odd I follow everyone else... they laugh I laugh that kind of thing.
Dyspraxia and other things I have frustrate me as a lot of the time people just do not understand me. People I talk to think I shout at them, I have been told I do this, I have no control over it. My voice gets louder with excitement and frustration.. I dont know when I do it. I only know when someone says I am shouting. I find if I can see their faces and they talk slowly I am usually ok and 'act' normal.
I guess stress and trying to cope with everything that is going on around me right now is not really helping. See some days when I do sit down I just want to scream... or throw something and then I am fine again. And unfortunately sometimes my cross stitching project I am working on gets launched across the room. Han and Jon understand me and try everything to calm me... but usually after that I am fine as the frustration is out of my system. I keep telling myself I am only human after all!
By telling my story, or rather a little of my story I hope to spread awareness of Dyspraxia.... as its not very well known at all.
I hope all of you dont mind me posting this... I mean its not what you come to see is it?! So at the bottom here I would like to show you all what I have been stitching to keep myself busy with...
First is this design from The Drawn Thread called "Four Fat Friends"....
Then as I really love this bee design.. its a Prairie Schooler bee.. the lovely Frances sent me :)...
I have to finish them.. but I cannot use the sewing machine right now as I know the noise will be too much for me. Maybe soon... so I will just carry on stitching then have a mega session on my sewing machine!
I feel really happy that I taught myself how to stitch.. it took me for what seemed forever to pick it up.. but I did! And yes its one of the things I am proud of. I think I like it so much as its repetitive, stitching crosses! Its taught me patience and actual calms me if I am feeling frustrated.. ha ah after I have thrown something or screamed! And then somehow I stitch lovely designs! Amazes me!!
The future and dyspraxia for me will not change, I have it, it wont go... I have to learn to live with it. I sometimes think I dont live very well with it and need more help in understanding myself. I hope I will find some... for those day s I just seem to not cope.
Thank you for popping in and I hope I have done my job and you are now a little more aware of Dyspraxia?